Two small stories for April Fools

compliments of

compliments of

Because we are all of us April fools most days of the year…


Girl two was in the bathtub yelling madly on the weekend.

Daddy…..  Daddy…..

On principle, I never interrupt when I hear this call. But I was starting to feel agitated waiting for him to respond. I told myself she had just dropped something or least it was a small injury.

Daddy …..

My husband does not hurry, even when a drowning or gushing flesh wound seem likely

Daddy …..

At last I heard him entering the bathroom to answer the call of distress.

What was it? I wanted to know when he returned. Is she okay?

She wanted to know if there were electric eels in Canada.



I drove in the driveway to see three children huddled around a tree, obviously covering something up as a result of my entry. They cast glances in my direction and huddled more tightly around the tree. I couldn’t think of any tree related crimes requiring immediate attention so I put the car in the garage and went inside. Half an hour later, they were knocking on my door triumphant.

They had a surprise for me. They could microwave it if I’d like but they wanted me to see it before it went any further.

A mug was held out with a half an inch of clear liquid.

It’s sap!

We got it ourselves!

For you!

It’s a surprise!

They had found a nail, pounded it into a tree and wiggled it, while catching drips in plastic cup. They had strained bits of tree bark out with limited success.

I took a tiny sip, proclaimed my delight and suggested more cups.

No way, they said. We all had some. The rest is for you.

Every bit of it.

It’s our surprise, they said.

So I have a mug of sap and tree bark in the kitchen. I can’t bear to throw it out but neither do I wish to drink it.